Introductions and Handshakes: Getting It Right

First introductions set the tone for every relationship that follows. Whether meeting a potential employer, your partner’s parents, or a new neighbor, the first few seconds establish an impression that is remarkably difficult to change. The good news is that making a strong first impression requires no special talent — just attention, warmth, and a few practiced habits.

The Handshake

The handshake remains the standard greeting in most professional and many social contexts in Western cultures. A good handshake communicates confidence and respect in about two seconds.

Firmness: Match the other person’s grip. Too weak suggests timidity. Too strong suggests you are compensating for something. Aim for confident and engaged.

Duration: Two to three seconds. Holding on longer feels controlling. Releasing too quickly feels dismissive.

Eye contact: Look the person in the eye during the handshake. Looking away suggests distraction or discomfort.

Dry hands: If your palms tend to sweat, discreetly wipe them before the handshake. A clammy handshake is memorable for all the wrong reasons.

Handshake Type	What It Communicates
Firm with eye contact	Confidence and respect
Weak and brief	Uncertainty or disinterest
Bone-crushing	Insecurity disguised as dominance
Two-handed	Warmth (in personal contexts) or patronizing (in professional contexts)

When Handshakes Are Not Appropriate

Some situations call for alternative greetings. Post-pandemic awareness has made many people more cautious about physical contact. If someone does not extend their hand, do not force it. A warm verbal greeting with a nod or slight bow is perfectly acceptable.

In many Asian cultures, a bow is standard. In parts of the Middle East, cross-gender handshakes may be avoided. In Latin America, a handshake may be followed by an embrace or cheek kiss depending on the relationship. The safest approach is to pause briefly and let the other person initiate.

Making Introductions

When introducing two people who do not know each other, the traditional rule is to introduce the less senior person to the more senior person: “Dr. Williams, I would like you to meet my colleague Sarah Chen. Sarah, this is Dr. Williams, our department chair.”

In casual settings, formality is unnecessary: “Sarah, this is my friend James. James, Sarah and I work together.” Providing a conversation starter in the introduction helps: “James is also a runner — he just finished the Chicago marathon.”

Always introduce people standing alone at gatherings. If you see someone you know looking isolated, bring them into your conversation. This small act of inclusion is one of the most powerful social gestures available.

Remembering Names

Forgetting names immediately after hearing them is nearly universal. Techniques that help:

• Repeat the name immediately: “Nice to meet you, Sarah.” Using the name in conversation helps encode it in memory.
• Make a mental association: Connect the name to something memorable about the person or an image.
• If you forget, be honest: “I am so sorry, I have completely blanked on your name.” This is far less awkward than guessing wrong or avoiding the person for the rest of the evening.

Digital Introductions

Email and LinkedIn introductions follow their own etiquette. Before introducing two people via email, ask both parties if they are open to the introduction. A double-opt-in approach respects everyone’s time. When making the introduction, explain clearly why you think the connection is valuable for both parties.

Group Introductions

When introducing someone to a group, provide enough context that they can join conversations naturally. “Everyone, this is Marcus — he just moved here from Portland and is a huge Trailblazers fan” gives the group multiple conversation entry points.

In professional group settings, introduce new members to each person individually rather than a collective wave-and-nod. Individual introductions take more time but create stronger initial connections and help the newcomer remember names.

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